Day 45

 I am sitting in the middle in my class but feeling very winded, mentally. I can't seem to focus because there are so many things running through my mind, I feel like I need to organize myself. Despite the fact that I genuinely enjoy having my teacher because he is really passionate about what he does, I can't bring myself to focus. As I normally say, I am feeling particularly more ADD than other days. For one, I was super oppressed yesterday and I think some of it may have travelled on to this day. I held auditions because as I may have told you, I am choreographing a piece for teen talent. Without giving out too much information, I didn't accept one particular auditionee. However, she is the child of a staff member at the church. But from what I remember, her audition was awful and I do not wanna get stuck working with a kid who can't dance just because her mom works there. The good news is, I know everyone is very understanding and even if I get stuck with her, I know exactly where I'm gonna put her. (in the back). Okay, I'm just gonna rant on my page. I feel like I'm holding back way too much, and holding back from what I really have to say. 

When I got home I was WIPED. So auditions went well. I was super oppressed like I said, and it went away eventually after like three hours. Some moments were harsher than others. This morning, I caught a glimpse of it again, but I feel it going away little by little. I just feel like it prevented me from worshipping and praying freely. I just have to keep remembering that song that we as a choir declared so beautifully. I'm gonna put it in all caps because we sang it in all caps. "I'M NOT AFRAID, ALL IS WELL, ALL IS WELL". "The God who governs angel armies, has set encampments around me. Whom shall I fear." 

Sorry I got distracted on instagram. I think I feel a lot better, but I gotta delete instagram and youtube. reels are addicting. 

Anyways

Soph